HONEST, AM I LYING?                

Welcome to this honest article. Is it about techniques when telling a lie? Honestly, I’m lying. Do I know when this article will end? Soon, you’re thinking! Stay with me for now! I don’t know all the answers, and I am not telling a lie. No lie, I am honest. 

Ready all?

Honesty means the quality of being fair and truthful. Also, it is sincerity, uprightness, or frankness. All of these are free from deceit or fraud. Honest people are not fake, false, or artificial. They are genuine. It is essential, to be direct, and tell the truth by avoiding deception by either omission or fraud.

Honesty is the best policy is a proverb by Sir Edwin Sandys, a politician and a colonial entrepreneur who was prominent in the Virginia Company. Years later, the company became instrumental in founding America’s first colony in Jamestown, Virginia. The proverb has a simple meaning: it is better to tell the truth than to tell a lie, no matter the consequences. Is this always the best scenario to choose? Probably not the best way to go. 

A second quote attributed to Thomas Jefferson states, Honesty is the first chapter in the Book of Wisdom.” Jefferson wrote and spoke many quotes throughout his life, including several about honesty. Around twenty movies have been released with “Honest” in their title. The list includes 1939’s You Can’t Cheat An Honest Man” with W.C. Fields, and Liam Neeson starred in An Honest Thief” in 2020. Both films had nothing to do with being honest or doing truthful acts of kindness. In addition, about ten flicks use “Honesty” in their name. Incorperating one meaning with the awful strange movie title, (Dis)honesty: The Truth About Lies.”

Let me continue. To lie has many meanings. Using a lie in this context is defined as making any untrue or false statement with the intent to cheat or betray others. Also, it is when someone creates an incorrect or a false, misleading impression.

A fib is considered a small lie. Often it is called a white lie. In several instances, a tale is usually so small on a scale of untruths that its weight and consequences are equally small. A lie, on the other hand, is heavier. Overall it carries more significance and can lead to severe outcomes. One might fib to preserve and protect someone else’s feelings or save oneself from a long explanation. Individuals who fib many times do not realize that a lie has occurred. A possible scene is when we do not want to tell the boss why we are late to work.

Someone making a lie often does this to avoid being embarrassed, but this is a different way. We want to have others think better of the person telling the fib. Sometimes, we fib or lie because we want this so badly, to say the truth, that the lie becomes our actual truth. Also, individuals repeatedly perceived as dishonest often desire to be in control. And that is the honest truth.

Before we decide that honesty is the best policy, think again. Sarah Crow, a health editor and writer from many publications, wrote that “A Little Fib Never Hurt Anyone-In Fact, Lying May Be Good For You.”

Below are the ten reasons why she thinks lying is good for us.

Each begins with Lying Can

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Make You More Productive    

Make You A Better Friend

Boost Your Mood                

Smooth out Parenting Stress

Improve Your Relationship                     

Keep You On Track Toward Your Goals

Make You A More Effective Boss           

Boost Your Negotiation Skills

Improve Your Self-Esteem

Ms. Crow suggests that we discover why it is good for us to lie. Evaluate our desires and motivations for telling the truth. Do not think too long and reread the above. Her long-term research implies that learning to lie positively is an important developmental milestone. Just do not make it a recurrent theme in our life.

While some lie more frequently than others, usually, it is not a sign of concern for mental health conditions. Pathological lying is a different story. There is an underlying mental health problem, such as a personality disorder. Having a symptom of pathological lying as a personality disorder includes but is limited to ‘antisocial’, ‘narcissistic’, and ‘histrionic’ behaviors. Some conditions of the ‘borderline disorder’ can lead to recurrent lies, but the actual lies themselves are not considered pathological. An essential part of diagnosing a pathological liar is determining if someone recognizes that someone is lying or believes the lie that person said. Some professionals use a polygraph, also known as a lie detector.

Successful mental health living is honesty. The only way to find help is to be honest, and ask for it. We need to encourage others to be frank and reward honesty with compassion. Always make our presence here known and felt but in a low-key, non-judgmental manner. Also, remember, as Peer Specialists, it is not our reason isn’t understanding, but the willingness to try to understand. 

Help You Confront Your Fears                

Yes, Peer Specialists fib and lie, just like everyone else. I kept to a bare minimum because the most critical key is always being honest with ourselves. However, lying can be good for the mind. Lying also has its place in our human experience. Make a lie as infrequently as necessary, but it is vital to our well-being.

Honestly, I think our better times are ahead. However, I’d be lying not to tell everyone. It won’t be easy. There will be both smooth sailing and bumpy roads, good and bad times ahead. Focus on the positive. Please make the most of what we have and always be honest to seek to do better. 

Here we are at the end of another article. Honest, am I lying?

See you in the Newsletters and NewsBlogs.

Categories: GUIDE, Howard Diamond

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